Lately, getting myself and the girls ready for church has been a real struggle if not impossible. Michael has been playing in the worship band during morning service so he's typically ready and out the door without us by 7:47 am.
He leaves me not only to get the girls all cleaned and purtyed up in their Sunday best, but also to get them there in time.
It is also my job to play "single parent pew-rangler" once we're there.
Yesterday was no exception to the rule - looking back at the morning, it would have been wiser just stay home in bed. Here were the list of injuries we sustained even before the first hymn was sung.
1. Birdie bit PK on the arm. This totally came out of left field, Birdie has never bit anyone, as far as I know. And by bite I mean she almost broke skin. It left a very noticeable mark - I now can tell you how many teeth she has.
2. Additionally, PK sustained a major splinter in her left heal from playing outside on the deck barefoot. And by splinter I mean full-on telephone log in her foot. HUGE! Of course she wouldn't let me touch it so she spent the morning walking on the tip-toes of her feet. (it's still there).
3. While getting myself ready, Birdie discovered the HOT end of my very new, very professional hair straightener. I take full bad-mom responsibility for this one. She has a mild blister on her thumb.
4. Then, the icing on the cake happened en route from dropping off Birdie in the Church nursery (because I failed as pew-wrangler). Cute shoes = clumsy mom who does not know how to walk properly. I totally full-on wiped out head first down a flight of stairs leading in to the sanctuary. Yes, the sanctuary was full. Yes, I was wearing a knee-length dress. Yes, I was loud, as I'm not exactly a small person. No, I'm not sure how many people I flashed my brilliance to.
Yes, I almost took an immediate right and bolted for the exit door instead of walking into service....
But I glamorously walk into the Sanctuary like I owned the place. Like I totally meant to do that.
Then I pretty much sat and cried in the pew from the skin (and confidence) I lost on those stairs.
The shoes are now scuffed - but still very cute.
He leaves me not only to get the girls all cleaned and purtyed up in their Sunday best, but also to get them there in time.
It is also my job to play "single parent pew-rangler" once we're there.
Yesterday was no exception to the rule - looking back at the morning, it would have been wiser just stay home in bed. Here were the list of injuries we sustained even before the first hymn was sung.
1. Birdie bit PK on the arm. This totally came out of left field, Birdie has never bit anyone, as far as I know. And by bite I mean she almost broke skin. It left a very noticeable mark - I now can tell you how many teeth she has.
2. Additionally, PK sustained a major splinter in her left heal from playing outside on the deck barefoot. And by splinter I mean full-on telephone log in her foot. HUGE! Of course she wouldn't let me touch it so she spent the morning walking on the tip-toes of her feet. (it's still there).
3. While getting myself ready, Birdie discovered the HOT end of my very new, very professional hair straightener. I take full bad-mom responsibility for this one. She has a mild blister on her thumb.
4. Then, the icing on the cake happened en route from dropping off Birdie in the Church nursery (because I failed as pew-wrangler). Cute shoes = clumsy mom who does not know how to walk properly. I totally full-on wiped out head first down a flight of stairs leading in to the sanctuary. Yes, the sanctuary was full. Yes, I was wearing a knee-length dress. Yes, I was loud, as I'm not exactly a small person. No, I'm not sure how many people I flashed my brilliance to.
Yes, I almost took an immediate right and bolted for the exit door instead of walking into service....
But I glamorously walk into the Sanctuary like I owned the place. Like I totally meant to do that.
Then I pretty much sat and cried in the pew from the skin (and confidence) I lost on those stairs.
The shoes are now scuffed - but still very cute.
23 comments:
Mon May 04, 01:31:00 PM
Ouch Ouch Ouch!
Mon May 04, 01:52:00 PM
What a bad day! Don't you wish the universe gratned do overs. You need a total and complete do over.
Mon May 04, 02:10:00 PM
you have NO IDEA how much I relate to this. The story of my entire life is wrang-tangling my kids to church without Matt. That is why he appreciates anyone on the worship team with kids...he has an extra dose of appreciation for their wives...
maybe coffee soon....
Mon May 04, 02:27:00 PM
Okay, OUCH!
What a morning! And scuffed shoes? Boo. But they ARE cute!
Mon May 04, 02:28:00 PM
Oh no!!! Painful! For all of you. But especially you.
Can I tell you the SAME EXACT THING happened to me when I was about 22 years old? I was at my cousins wedding and feeling pretty snazzy in my hot new outfit, and fabulous shoes. Was walking down a HUGE flight of stairs that happened to have rubber edging on the front when my shoe caught and I went A$$ over tea kettle all the way down right in front of the whole wedding reception of people. I actually did a front summer sault in the air and skidded the rest of the way down. I had to lie there for a minute before I could breath again and then I ran to the bathroom to wash the black rubber marks off my legs. My cousin came in to help me and saw my scrubbing my legs. She said, "Stop hon! Those are dirty rubber marks, that is your legs! You're black and blue!"
Yeah. Very cool. :O
Mon May 04, 04:21:00 PM
Oooowwwwwwiiiiieee! When I was 9, I fell down the balcony stairs at my church ... during service ... did I mention it was Easter Sunday and the church was packed?!? BOOM! Made quite a spectacle of m'self, I'm proud to say! Took me years before I would go up into that balcony again.
Mon May 04, 05:50:00 PM
OUCH! That is terrible, but at least you did it at church, where I am sure everyone prayed silently for you. Hang in there!!!
Mon May 04, 05:59:00 PM
you are a super mom. fer real.... i woulda gone back to bed.
Mon May 04, 06:14:00 PM
Ouch and LOL! YOu will laugh about this someday! In the meantime, don't wear heels for a while!
Mon May 04, 06:18:00 PM
i can recall a time when you literally took a nice sized bite out of jenna's arm when she wouldn't move over for you in the car while on the way to florida....remember that? i believe you were in high school....birdie must be taking after her mother, ha!! hope your leg feels better.
Mon May 04, 06:21:00 PM
Ouch that looks like it hurt!
Mon May 04, 07:19:00 PM
You poor thing, I'm so sorry. That leg looks awful...well I mean the skin missing on the legs looks awful. I know that it must have hurt, the pride and the leg too! I hope you are feeling better and you definitely deserve one heck of a mom's day gift!!
Mel
Mon May 04, 07:53:00 PM
Ohhhh!! I know PK's pain.My sister wouldn't play with me and got really mad, pushed me from behind and I fell forward on the bed and she then took a nice chunk out of my right butt-cheek when I was 9 and I'm 36 yrs old and the scar is still there, but it now looks like a "hickey". Sisterly love!! Your shoes are so adorable and so you but the injury on your leg looks so painful. So what I want to know is what did Michael have to say about it all; any sympathy??
MC
Mon May 04, 08:05:00 PM
Oh man. Will you be mad at me if I admit that I wish I had seen that fall into the sanctuary? Im sure I missed it while wrangling my own two. Im glad both you and the shoes are ok...they sure are cute!
Mon May 04, 08:07:00 PM
OMG, that is horrible. You're lucky all you got was that BIG scratch. You could have hurt yourself so much more. Next time just STAY in bed, Mkay!
Mon May 04, 08:52:00 PM
I feel your pain, almost physically. Just looking at that hurts, and that doesn't even say anything about the injured pride. I'm sorry.
Tue May 05, 12:42:00 PM
I was having a bad morning today. Then I read your blogpost. You got me beat by a mile! So sorry about the shannagans of getting to church. I tell ya, these little ones put the house (and your life) under new management. I hope your leg feels better soon and you have a fabulous day today and recoup.
Tue May 05, 05:10:00 PM
Oh my gosh....
Tue May 05, 09:34:00 PM
This is why 3 out of 4 Sundays we miss church. Darn kids. And seriously? I would have cried and gotten someone to at least act concerned cause that looks PAINFUL! But I will admit that I just giggled loudly while reading it all :)
Wed May 06, 06:31:00 AM
I'm not laughing AT you, I'm laughing WITH you, right? Thanks for my first good laugh of the day! And those shoes? Totally worth the clumsiness. They are really stinkin' cute.
Wed May 06, 04:13:00 PM
Ouch... yikes that's a rough fall!!
I play pew-mommie too... it's the only way I can sit in service! If I don't have them with me, then I am with THEM in the nursery... small church!!!
Sunday was rough for us too. I have to take Christopher out 2 times!!! After the first time out I thought he won't wantt o leave again.... but after every syllable my husband (the pastor) said you could hear my son's whimper.... grrr..
anyway, we made it through. Glad you survived as well:)
Wed May 06, 04:32:00 PM
Does this mean you don't have to shave that section of your leg for a couple months? Optimistically yours, Mr. Blonde
Fri May 08, 09:59:00 PM
Oh my goodness! Bless your heart! I can feel your pain.... my husband plays in the worship band a lot and I'm left with all three kiddos. Not EASY!
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